Any form of anxiety can plague a persons life yet it’s such a broad thing that I don’t think it’s possible to deal with it all as one huge thing, you have to separate it and deal with them in different ways and one of the most common and hard to deal with is anxiety regarding ones appearance. We’re born looking the way we do, and as we grow up our appearance changes, sometimes dramatically, sometimes only a little, but either way because there’s an element of not being able to change how we look that makes it such a difficult anxiety to deal with. But you live with yourself every day, and you see your reflections intentionally or otherwise several times each day, so how can you deal with your anxieties?
First of all understand that everyone, no matter what they say, has been anxious about their appearance. In a world where there are tonnes of images of supposed perfection, massively over-produced edits and where trends are constantly changing it’s no surprise that every so often even the most beautiful/handsome of people feel self-conscious. I’ve spoken about how good films, books, and music can be, but they can also be quite damaging because naturally, whether it’s the case or not we like to see the characters success or love as being a result of their attractiveness. Even in romance films and books where the characters are insanely good looking, most of what attracts the characters to each other is grounded in the way they are, their personality and how they project themselves. Yet some of us, who feel uncertain of our own looks often ignore that in order to improve how we feel about not being where we want to be. The brain is such a powerful thing that we could never truly look at ourselves the way everyone else does, in fact, every person who meets you sees you in a different way. So why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to mold ourselves into a level of agreed beauty that changes every two seconds?
Here’s my theory; so many of us have been sucked into this collectively created, sort of understandable, conformist myth. Maybe it’s because, generally speaking its the first thing we notice, or maybe there’s another reason, but either way, beauty has almost been hailed as the sole reason for someone being successful or in love. Not only is this not true, it undermines everything about a persons talent, character and overall drive, Yet just like every other myth, there is an alternative explanation that comes with it. Anxiety, in whatever form, when it goes on for a prolonged amount of time, and becomes debilitating is a mental illness, and with every mental illness comes a horrific, overbearing, nagging feeling of insignificance. That insignificance distorts the way we view every aspect of ourselves, and our position in our society, which is where a lot of the problems stem from. Whatever level of physical beauty a person has, once their mental health has been threatened even a little bit, it becomes arbitrary; the brains power is so scary sometimes but there is always a little space that allows us to have some control. Grab it. Own it. Find out who you are, when you do, focus on loving that individuality, loving that part of you that sets you apart from the crowd, small or big, because that will improve your happiness, confidence and in turn view of your appearance. Anyone in this world knows that happiness makes a person look a hundred times more attractive, genuine confident happiness, and sometimes all it takes is understanding who you are, and what makes you different from everyone else.
So come one guys, one of the greatest things about this world is how there are so many of us, and yet not a single person is completely the same. A subtle dimple, a love for a specific type of book, a collection of china bichon frise’, whatever it is! These little individual quirks are where the real beauty is located, and I’m not just saying that in an optimistic, everything-is-awesome manner, I’m telling the truth. Moreover, anyone that intentionally picks on an aspect of your appearance to be intentionally malicious, or loves you purely for your looks isn’t worth your time. Be proud. Be happy. Be confident. Embrace your insecurities and they will naturally become the very things you love the most, because they make you who you are.
Remember, your reflection isn’t you, it’s a blank empty copy of you, you can’t judge your self-worth or beauty by looking at an untrue version of yourself!